I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
