I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
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