woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Randomize