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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
