This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Randomize
