we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
