There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
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