Midget sex pt 2 tonight
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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