Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Randomize
