i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
