NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it