Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
