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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  No

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.

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• 

  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.

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• (707): View more from California

  You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.

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• 

  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

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• (352): View more from Florida

  Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.

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• (305): View more from Florida

  he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!

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• (623): View more from Arizona

  I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  At what part of the night did you guys leave?

  (406): View more from Montana

  After my hot tub cannonball.

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