People in love make me want to vomit
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
31 People Admit To Nasty Things They Do On The Reg
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY