You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
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