I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Banned from zoo.
Again?
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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