I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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