i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
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I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
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I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed