and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
