She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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