You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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