if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
