im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one