let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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