wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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