cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
They have beer where we have blood.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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