i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
it's like iHOP with fire
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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