My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
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