HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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