As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I need to wash the frat house off of me
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
