no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
