guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
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