Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
