yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
