He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
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