On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
