The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize
