i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Terrible idea I love it
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize