Texts From Last Night

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  (914): View more from New York

  this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.

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  (914): this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again. http://tfl.nu/zwji
  Replies (5) Good night (2501) Bad night (747)
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  (409): View more from Texas

  so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister

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  (409): so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister http://tfl.nu/4kg0
  Replies (56) Good night (9276) Bad night (2620)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.

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  (724): I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard. http://tfl.nu/gkmc
  Replies (62) Good night (9819) Bad night (1710)
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  (714): View more from California

  He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher

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  (714): He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher http://tfl.nu/npc9
  Replies (21) Good night (1250) Bad night (6641)
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me

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  (218): i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me http://tfl.nu/gpjb
  Replies (19) Good night (1471) Bad night (5355)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van

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  (817): He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van http://tfl.nu/z2ov
  Replies (2) Good night (2215) Bad night (922)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.

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  (614): I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person. http://tfl.nu/hjb8
  Replies (6) Good night (2718) Bad night (1238)
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  (716): View more from New York

  i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.

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  (716): i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man. http://tfl.nu/v8cz
  Replies (6) Good night (2181) Bad night (980)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.

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  (360): I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds. http://tfl.nu/g0ca
  Replies (6) Good night (1572) Bad night (677)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt

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  (410): halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt http://tfl.nu/2dpk
  Replies (8) Good night (2970) Bad night (769)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?

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  (613): have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics? http://tfl.nu/lk3z
  Replies (7) Good night (1490) Bad night (759)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.

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  (302): Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird. http://tfl.nu/awda
  Replies (1) Good night (795) Bad night (406)
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.

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  (865): I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend. http://tfl.nu/e59a
  Replies (7) Good night (1271) Bad night (470)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA

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  (647): SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA http://tfl.nu/8r7b
  Replies (0) Good night (363) Bad night (253)
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  (618): View more from Illinois

  I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night

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  (618): I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night http://tfl.nu/cx13
  Replies (2) Good night (556) Bad night (217)

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