I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
