...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Ever since I got married, I've become the MacGuyver of masturbation
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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