I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
i dont even know how to be here
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
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