oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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