I like to think it a success when the cops are called
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize