she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Come on in and take your pants off
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