if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize