Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
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