If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
