Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
