I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
