I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
