What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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